Long week

May 21, 2012 sweetpea2200
Tags: , , , , , ,

First, I would like to say sorry to my readers, I have not been posting much lately. The last few weeks have been really hard emotional and even physically and my faith has been tested. I have been asking God for a sign to know which way my relationship the ex should go, and if I got a sign. I totally missed it. Part of me wants my family back but the other part of me knows that the relationship will not work because there are things that I need or want in the relationship that he cannot gave me. I do not believe, I can give those things up so, I am putting it in God’s hands. I have faith that God’s Will will be done. My prayer is very simple, Lord, you know my heart and I do not know what my feeling toward him are anymore. Lord, if we are to be together, please change my expectations, and if we are not to be together then please send me the man I am to be with Lord, because I am tired and I would like someone to share my life with. Amen

Then my budget has been pinched pretty tight and it is stressing me out, and I am trying to keep my faith because God says do not worry and I will prove for your needs. Now, I have come to the conclusion that, that might mean moving home to live with my parents, and if that is God’s Will then please Lord, open my heart. God, if it is not please continue to give me strength and continue to provide.

Then, with all this extra stress, I feel the new me slipping a way into an abyss, and the old anger bitter me coming out, which it frustrating me more. I want the nice humble sweet me to come back. I feel powerless to stop it. Lord, please, help me continue to grow in You and please help me to not fall back into my old habits.

I am going to pray, pray, pray, read my Bible, and bury myself in podcast of God’s word. Which, I have discovered are pretty awesome. I found Dr. Charles Stanley podcast and I as so excited. I love podcast, I have so many on my iPhone, I could not download anymore. Sweet

please excuse any grammar and typos as I am typing on my tiny 8in keyboard.

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Entry Filed under: Faith,Friends,Relationships

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. jbstoons  |  May 22, 2012 at 9:56 PM

    I believe if I did not have God in my life helping me I would be a total mess. I thank God every night for saving me. Keep Him first and everything will work out. What we need to remember God does not work in our time.

    • 2. sweetpea2200  |  May 22, 2012 at 11:15 PM

      :), yes, I would have fallen apart years ago with God. You are absolutely right, God does not work on our time. I am trying to leave everything in God’s hands, but I keep taking it back then there is not an answer quick enough only to discover again that I cannot handle it only God can.


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